There are so many things going through my mind right now, and yet I struggle to put them into something readable. However, the creative muse has struck and will not be denied. You may wonder about the strange title of this blog post. Let me explain. There has been a recent development of new babies and newly announced pregnancies at our church. Lest you think this post is just sour grapes, let me set your mind at ease. I love babies, and I love the people that are pregnant. It’s the comments that hurt. You know the ones. “Don’t drink the water at our church!” or “I’m staying away from your church.” While I know these things are said in jest, it still hurts. If it was really “in the water” I would not only have drunk it, but I would have bathed in it by now. And that’s saying something. The water at our church tastes horrible and smells like rotten eggs. No thanks! And yes, I know the intention of all the people joking about it is not to cause me hurt. They just don’t know. I have attended our church for over five years now, and I can tell you, it’s not in the water.
This is not me being mean. This is me being vulnerable. I know that I’m not the only one to have suffered from the comments of others. Therefore, if I can cause you to think about what you’re saying, maybe someone else will benefit from it in the future. I’ve actually had people say to me “Getting pregnant is not that hard. Just read some books about it.” Yes, you really did just read that. I’ve heard people plan out their next pregnancy in great detail saying, “it only takes us one try so I have to get this timed just right.” Or one of my favorites, “Be glad you don’t have to go through pregnancy. You’re getting your baby the easy way.” And all the while, my heart hurts a little more. Most of you have no idea what we have been through trying to have children. And that’s okay, you don’t need to know everything. I’m just saying that I sure wish it was as easy as some of you seem to think. And by the way, there is nothing easy about adoption. Just sayin’.
In my work as a nurse, I see a lot. Every week, I watch precious babies go home to families that are broken. Sometimes I see them go straight into foster care from the hospital. I see them as they withdraw from the substances their mothers ingested. And it hurts my heart. These innocent little ones are going through hell through no fault of their own. And there’s nothing that I can do to stop the pain. However, it does give me a chance to pray for these little souls that have such a rough start in life. And maybe that’s why I’m allowed to see so much pain. I hope that God is using those prayers to help those little ones.
So if it’s not in the water, where is it? It’s in God’s gift to you, His blessing on your life. Please don’t take it for granted. I’m not saying that we’re not blessed by God. We are! We have one of the best marriages that I know of anywhere. We are in love, and happy. God has blessed us in many ways. But for now, our prayers for children remain unanswered. Sometimes God allows a season of pain into our lives. We don’t understand why, but we hold on to Him. We pray that somehow He will receive glory for what He is doing in us. And when that little one does come to us, you can be sure that we will not take that blessing for granted.